My lack of blogging isn't for the lack of things to write about, but more of a no time to write about the things. The Farrell family has been in full on sports-mode the last couple of months.
They say that sports reveal character, and I have been wondering a LOT about that lately.
It is REALLY, REALLY!!! tough to watch these kids play on the teams they play on. Some kids are really aggressive, and have no problem letting other kids know when they have messed up. In some ways, I admire agressive people. Especially when they go all out, and aren't afraid to mess up. But when my kid screws up, I am NOT so much liking that they(the aggressive ones) let them know in their face during the game. It's the coach's job to correct the players, not the other players. But then, here's where I ask myself "did I teach my kid to just take it?"
Am I teaching my kids to just take the crap because I have asked them to be peacemakers, and mostly passive? Dr Phil says that we teach others how to treat us, and I am thinking that's pretty true. I have told them to stick up for themselves, and tell the little twerp's to lay off (in a very direct tone). I don't want my kids to just take it up the woohoo because they have been conditioned to make nice.
Did I create my kid's sports style by the way I parented or is it just a true reflection of their personality?
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3 comments:
There is this thing called "quiet confidence" that one of my coach's always talked about, and I have tried to instill it when coaching. It's that ability to know your good at your skills, use people's criticism/trash talk as a way to fuel your drive... not destroy it, and to not belittle those around you even when they are jerks. It's tough to learn, and I think your kids are more likely to head that direction. I'm sorry it's so painful and I'll just say that your coach has got his own ego wrapped up too much in a bunch of 13/14 year old boys.
It's not necessarily a bad thing to not react to someone else being a ding-dong. ;) I'd say that's pretty impressive actually if they are doing it because they have self restraint and not because they are intimidated.
Totally agrees with Ashlie. Not reacting to other people's petty behaviour shows some self restraint and probably also that your kids are confident - they don't need to defend themselves.
I think is impressive if your kids can raise above the level of these others. Sometimes in life, you just have to let it go - life's to short to care everytime someone is a jerk!
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