I have spoken recently to a couple of friends about honesty. Like, being honest with how we feel, asking the hard questions, and so forth...
I feel that as a 34year old mother of three, with a hectic life, I don't have time to guess about how someone feels, or how you feel about me.
I tell my friends I love them because I DO, and hope that if I do something to bug them, they tell me too(in an email, for example, with the appropiate emoticons:)...
I realize that TOTAL honesty (like, please don't tell me my hair is too big, I already know) is not always useful, but if I asked you if you thought it was too big, feel free to say so!
(and then I will ignore your response, and grab my Aussie Instant Freeze anyways!)
But if we feel like we are in a relationship where we are confused or unsure of where we stand, shouldn't we speak up?
So, where is this all coming from?
I have a friend that I adored, that I am not sure where I stand anymore. If she doens't want to be friends anymore, I want her to tell me. It's painful to be left hanging, wondering what you did wrong? It was one of those friendships I truly thought that would be lifetime, and now I feel like I am left to mourn the loss of it, and I don't even know why?
So, if this friend is reading this, I love you, I miss you, please email, comment, or write to tell me what's going on?
And some more honesty...grocery shopping with Shayne makes me want to grab his buns right there in front of the Hot Pockets, okay, I DID grab my hunny's buns in front of the Hot Pockets!
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5 comments:
I remember blogging about something similar a few years ago about a friend. It turned out that she had actually gone through some things in her life that I think she was embarrassed about so she wasn't at the point she wanted to share them. Was I hurt at first? Yes, but knowing her I also realized she needed the space and she would come around when ready. It's hard to know what is going on when your loved ones won't let you in - and it's hard to know what to do. I hope you get answers!
As for grabbing Shayne's buns - it reminds me of a somewhat dirty joke that ends with "and now I'm not allowed to shop at Fry's anymore!" ;)
I've had this type of thing happen many times. Sadly, I ended up retreating, and the friendships were just lost. I applaud you for confronting it. Good luck!
You are such a good person and a good friend Kellie! I hope you can find answers. I need to hear the whole joke from Sandy I think:)
It's hard for me to imagine someone not wanting to be your friend.
I'm with Sandy. I think most of the time when I've felt like something was up with a friendship it had absolutely nothing to do with me and I was worried over nothing. You never know what's going on in someone's life. Or it may be as simple as she has no idea you're even feeling like this and would think, huh? I know I can be pretty oblivious sometimes. Hope it works out.
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